How I overcame my fear of promotion (most of the time)

If you find it sleazy to sell, this really helped me

I was the kid in school who could barely speak up in class without going bright red. When I first started posting on Instagram it took me 2 years to pluck up the courage to talk on camera. At my book launch, I was so nervous to speak I had butterflies for days just thinking about the fact that I’d have to do it.

So, when you say you find the idea of promoting yourself awkward, I really get it.

I still find the idea of talking to the internet, a room full of people, even a few strangers at an event absurdly awkward from time to time. Less so than before, but definitely a bit.

There are loads of reasons why I think this is (I talk about them at length in my book). A BIG one, though, is that for decades we’ve only been shown one type of salesperson, and that lad is nothing at all like me. Not in attitude, not in approach, not in aims.

Is it any wonder, then, that sales is one of those deeply unsexy parts of business that has become almost synonymous with sleaze?

Reimagining the stereotype

It’s not exactly a struggle to conjure up very clear mental images about what “salespeople” look and act like. Grabby, bolshy, out for themselves, you know the drill. Used car salespeople, bro marketing “gurus”, cocky fitness pros…hardly the aspiration of most creative micro business owners like us.

I got fed up. None of these people looked or sounded the REMOTEST bit like me. So a few years ago I decided to choose a more intentional definition to associate with the word “salesy”.

Getting clear on what it means to me to be able to promote my work, without all the inherited stories and stereotypes, has allowed me to find my own identity as a salesperson. It’s changed everything.

Instead of thinking about selling the way most people think do (salesy, icky, gross, like taking something from people), my view is totally different. Countercultural, even. Against the grain of dominant narrative. Just how I like it ;-)

Sales is not an act of taking, it’s the opposite.

It is my tool for generosity, giving, and creating change.

Being salesy (generous) feels NOTHING like the cringey, icky stereotype about salespeople because it isn’t centered on what’s in it for me, but instead, on what I’m able to co-create with my clients and the people around me.

1. Generosity is: giving yourself the time to replenish, not hustling or operating at henpecked level 10 because who does that ultimately help? Nobody but the patriarchy, that’ who.

2. Generosity is: making the time to do things with your family and never being too busy or rushed because you know how to make money in a way that doesn’t require you to be always on

3. Generosity is: bringing clarity to your ideas and actually sharing them, to bring about change for future generations, your community and the world as a whole

We all know how to do things the hard way, but how many of us are letting ourselves stay there out of habit? Now feels like a great time to reconsider the things that feel generous to you, because I’m not sure I have ever met a woman growing a business who is NOT also overgiving, overdelivering and overthinking somewhere in her life.

Here are a few examples of what (to me) is NOT generous:

1. It isn’t generous for you not to have the opportunities you want because you’re telling yourself promoting your brand, your ideas, your work online or in person is cringe

2. It isn’t generous for you to tell yourself that if your work was better it would sell itself. That’s never been true and the longer you keep believing it is, the slower your growth will be.

3. It isn’t generous to tell yourself that being good at your job should be enough to succeed. That’s only half the work. The other 50% is talking about it.

4. It isn’t generous to leave potential clients and collaborators to guess at what you do just because you’re too scared to be seen as “salesy” to get online and explain it often.

5. It isn’t generous to your family and friends to be giving every spare moment to plough into work. You don’t crave working long hours any more than I do, you’ve got a life to live and that life requires you to be making money.

6. Generosity is not: knowing what you wish to be different in your life or the wider world and then doing nothing about setting about getting it out of fear you’ll fail

7. Generosity is not: keeping your biggest hopes and dreams hidden so everyone is guessing at what you actually want and giving away the opportunities to others

8. Generosity is not: giving up all your time for pittance and staying under resourced in some outdated belief that that’s “just how it is”

Selling is an act of generosity. To yourself, to your clients and to the change you want to effect. And in this era of digital overwhelm, the most generous thing we can do is to make it easy for buyers find what they want

So, if you’re struggling with your identity as a salesperson, or you feel a bit yucky talking about your work, I invite you to make a list of all the things having more sales would allow you to do. It could be generosity, like me, or an improved financial experience, normalising a new way of working for future generations, or something else!

The case for empowered promotion

I’m kinda done with women feeling like they have to apologise for their success when what we desperately need is to normalise finding ways to succeed on our own terms. For as long as women are holding back in self promotion, our collective success is capped at what we can see in front of our noses.

I don’t promote myself online because I’m a natural at it, or because I love being centre stage. I do it because having a personal brand has given me everything I ever wanted from my work, and it can do the same for you.

The opportunities you can create for yourself through your personal brand in 2025 are unparalleled.

Opportunities to:

• work in a way that suits your season of life

• connect with people that make working feel like hanging out with friends

• collaborate on projects that are meaningful to you and that make the human experience better.

Figuring out how to stop blushing and start talking more freely about what I do has changed my life. And if all women, creatives and business owners felt 1% confident talking about what they do, we’d create more positive money stories, more examples of balanced living, more creative inspiration than ever.

So, if these sales (generosity) shifts help you stand up even a little bit taller this week, it’s a win.

Sara x

PS who else used to blush every time they were put in the spotlight?! ARGH!